Beyonce takes things literally

Poor Beyonce. I've been worried about her for awhile. First, she came out with her highly-anticipated follow-up to her debut solo project, Dangerously in Love, and decided to wear the wig that ate Pittsburgh on the cover. So instead of looking totally hot, she ended up looking like somebody's crazy aunt Melba.


Then, of course, there's the awkward title, B'Day. I'm pretty sure this is supposed to be "B-Day" like the abbreviation for birthday, but kind of looks like it should be pronounced "bidet," which, ew. All of these are unfortunate decisions on B's part, but nothing to be overly worried about.

Then Dreamgirls happened.

What was supposed to be her breakout performance turned into a coming-out party for Jennifer Hudson, relegating Beyonce to the role of "co-star who claps politely and smiles through the rage at every award show of the season." When Hudson won the Oscar, I think it was a tipping point for Miss Beyonce.

To wit: her new video for the song "Kitty Kat."




Wait, what? I saw this on April Fool's, but I'm pretty sure she's deadly serious. She's riding a house cat and batting around a ball of yarn. This is what her life has come to.

But I don't cry for her. Why? because I think this could mark the beginning of an exciting new arc in her career. She can go from being Miss Beyonce, diva extraordinaire, to Beyonce Knowles, crazy Diva who shows up to the red carpet wearing a cape and dragging along a manservant on a leash. She can be music's Janice Dickinson.

So ride that house cat Beyonce. Ride it.